8 Types of Eaters

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Which one are you?

Sometimes we’re a combination of a few.

The Yeah-I-Don’t-Eat-That

Image credit: Bri Solorzano

They’re the ones always picking food out from their dishes – much like a 4-year-old picking out veggies from lunch and not eating them. The slightly more responsible ones will know what they’re ordering and let the waiter/cashier know to exclude the ingredients they hate (eg. no coriander). At least that way they’re not wasting food.

The Live-To-Eat

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On the flip side to people being picky about their food, there are those who really should be a little pickier. They eat EVERYTHING and are not in the least bit fussy. At least eating out with them is always a breeze. You get to choose what to eat since they’re usually fine with whatever.

The Eh-Don’t-Waste-Your-Food

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These are the ones who will make you feel like you’re committing a grave sin by not finishing everything on your plate. Words you commonly hear come out of their mouths are, “Eh, there are people in other countries that don’t have enough food to eat and here you are wasting food. Finish it!” If trying to guilt trip you doesn’t work, they’ll just take your food from you and eat it.

The Eat-My-Feelings

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I think many of us have been this person at least once in our lives. There are several causes for this. Break up? Eat. Failed a test? Eat. Rejected job application? Eat. Sappy movie? Eat. Burnt a pancake? Throw… then eat something else.

The Is-It-Healthy-Tho

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They’re always keeping up with all the health food trends. When you’re looking for bubble tea, they’re looking for fruit/vegetable blends. The closest you’ll get them to fast food is Subway. The sight of your mala xiang guo would likely make them gag.

The If-There-Isn’t-A-Photo-Did-It-Happen

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They’d be rearranging the dishes, positioning themselves at different angles and snap, snap, snapping like 20 times before you get to eat. I know one thing that’s gonna snap and that’s my patience on an empty stomach. I really didn’t order my aglio olio just to wait for everyone’s dishes to arrive, you to take a photo album worth of shots then have my pasta… cold.

The I-Don’t-Have-Time

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These are people who are always running late or overworked and lunch hour is basically just another hour for work stuff. They eat SO fast and sometimes, they don’t eat at all. As they say it, “I was so busy, I forgot to eat” I’ve always wondered how one forgets to eat because I feel like my stomach’s a biological clock that sometimes rings way too many times in a day. I kind of wish there’s a snooze button.

The Eat-Without-Getting-Fat

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This is the Holy Grail, the absolute dream. Like seriously, how does this even work? They drink bubble tea with 100% sugar and when asked “ice cream or cake” they answer with “I’ll have ice cream ON cake”. All that and they still have the body of a runway model.

Now, can I order a higher metabolism? Thank you.

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